When “You Got This” Isn’t Enough: A Story About Real Collaboration

So many of us are taught to collaborate by being nice, helpful, and available. But true collaboration isn’t just about being available — it’s about being aligned. It’s about checking in not just with your presence, but with your purpose.

And it doesn’t require a leadership title. It requires a mindset.

Collaboration happens anytime people are working toward something together — whether that’s a colleague stepping in to co-host a workshop, a coach supporting a client with competing priorities, or a program assistant trying to juggle ten people’s schedules and still keep the office running.

The collaboration fails when we don’t know what we’re actually expecting from each other.

The collaboration works when we’re clear on:

• Who’s responsible for what
• What kind of support is needed (and offered)
• What decisions are being made, and by whom
• What we’re holding — and what we’re handing off

Being Person-Centered in Your Collaboration Changes Everything

When we approach collaboration with a person-centered lens — whether we’re leading a project, delivering services, or navigating team dynamics — everything shifts. Here’s what happens when we do it well:

• It saves time
  
• When roles, responsibilities, and communication are clear, people stop guessing and start moving.
  
• It reduces frustration
  
• No more spinning in circles about who dropped the ball or where decisions are happening. A person-centered approach honors transparency, agency, and shared accountability.
  
• It builds trust
  
• People trust collaborators who see them, listen without assumptions, and check for clarity instead of blame.
  
• It unlocks innovation
  
• When people feel safe, seen, and respected, they’re more likely to share their best ideas — not just the “safe” ones.
  

So, How Do You Become a More Person-Centered Collaborator?

You start by asking better questions:

• “What kind of support feels most useful right now?”
• “Are we clear on who’s carrying what?”
• “What decisions still feel fuzzy?”

You reflect on your own style:

• Do you default to doing it all?
• Wait to be asked?
• Give advice instead of asking questions?

Looking back, I can see how much that season shaped me. It taught me that support isn’t always about effort — it’s about fit. That good intentions don’t always translate to good collaboration. And that sometimes, what looks like trust from a distance can feel like isolation up close.

That experience changed the way I ask for help. I’m clearer now — not just about what I need, but how I need it. And it’s transformed the way I offer support to others. I no longer assume encouragement is enough. I ask better questions. I offer more clarity. I try to tune into what the moment calls for — not just what I’m used to giving.

That’s what person-centered collaboration makes possible. Not just smoother meetings or better team dynamics, but a deeper kind of trust. The kind that gives people room to breathe, speak up, and actually move forward, together. I believe that’s something we all deserve.